Letters from the weekend

I have decided to compose a couple of letters today. I was inspired, as I often am, by the way Rachel did this a couple of weeks ago. It is a good way to vent without actually getting in someones face. I am a therapist (haha) and you would think I would be able to do this in a more efficient manner than writing in my blog, but alas, the blog is my choice.

Dear Folks at my Fitness Center:
Yes, I know I haven't been going for a long time and have a lot of work ahead of me, so don't start getting "preachy" on me. But honestly, guys, if you are NOT using the piece of equipment would you please just move off of it and move along??? Do you have to hang on it, or sit there and stare at the girls/women that are walking by? You don't own the equipment and there might actually be other people wanting to use it! And ladies....if you are checking yourself in the mirror, getting your hair and makeup just right in the dressing room before going to workout, then maybe this isn't where you need to be. You need to go to a bar. If your hair is to your waist and you are out there working out without putting it up in some ponytail thingy or a clip, then we all know you are there for other reasons. Please quit staring at yourself every time you pass by the windows to catch your own reflection. Your self-indulgence is killing me! Go pull one of the guys up that is sitting on the equipment and introduce yourself and then both of you LEAVE!
Thank you for listening.....
Dianne

Dear Phlebotomist Girl:
Yes, I know you have been working at the blood donation services place for over a year, but if you have to stand there and think about it and aim and carry on before you stick me, then we have a problem. The huge bruise on my arm today is evidence of your lack of skills. And yes, I did suggest you take home a bag of oranges and practice with them over the weekend. This job is not for you. There are other jobs. Some people can do this one and some can't. You can't. Find another.
Now go away.....
Dianne

Dear Mystery Guest at my house:
Last night we were excited to have Glo over for the night. We cooked yummy chicken enchiladas and bean dip for supper. The plan was to have frozen margaritas. We had one of those buckets leftover out in the freezer from some time ago. Steve went and retrieved it to let it start thawing out. I could almost taste the slushy confection....but that was not to be. What was in the bucket instead was ice. Nothing but a big chunk of water that had turned into a big ice cube...no margarita mix or liquor left in there!!! Of course, for fun, we called each of our kids and accused them of drinking them at some point and then refilling the bucket with just water. They all denied it. So you, mystery guest, must be the culprit. I don't know when you did it but it was a very bad thing to do and not tell us!!!! Talk about some disappointed people!!!
You are not welcome back here again----
Dianne